Revealed in Reflection

Further self analysis:

My ability to dig deep when there is a chance of success is really good.  When it is a matter of survival, I completely suck.  I don’t know how this happened because when I was younger, it was completely the opposite.  To put it another way, I now need to be “in” the race to push myself.

I think it’s probably time for me to just say no to pro stage racing unless I can change that or I have the time to train enough to be competitive on some level.  I tried to train around my current situation and got sick, and I don’t think it was unrelated.

Stage 2 Owned Me

Suck.

The field absolutely shattered on the first climb like two miles into the race.  There’s no physiological reason I can’t go uphill.  I would even go so far as to say I was reasonably good at going uphill in my younger days.  Granted I trained 2-3X as much then… Anyway, I ended up chasing the gruppetto, catching the gruppetto, getting dropped from the gruppetto about three times.  At the base of Big Mountain (well thought out name that one), I quit.  I don’t think I would have made time cut, but I am really dissapointed in myself all the same. 

I am not going to go watch the crit tomorrow.  I think that might kill me.

EDIT:

Gotta get the heart back.